tasty

Earlier tonight I was hungry. Hungry and unmotivated. I wanted to eat. I wanted to eat something tasty, however I was having a problem getting really excited about eating because I ultimately understood that I'd be hungry again. I was frustrated with my body that it couldn't savor the food for longer than it does. I like to eat. All of this got me thinking about God. I was thinking about how our bodies are created to need food for fuel at every moment, and we always need to be seeking out more food. I was thinking about how our souls are similar. I think it is really interesting how we place so much emphasis on accepting Christ, when the reality is that is the birth, you know. I think the best analogy we should transmit to people is the idea of food. Entering into a relationship with God is agreeing to eat. It is realizing that he is sustenance and something we should continue to pursue all the time, not because we want to but because we need it to live. I like thinking about God like this. It makes a lot more sense to me and helps me remember that the "accepting" is almost irrelevant once you do it. "food for the stomach and stomach for food, but God will destroy them both," makes sense right?

San Francisco

Last week I was in Mill Valley for a class on worship. It was a great class, and most importantly a great trip. The seminary is located in a beautiful spot, with an amazing view of Alcatraz, the bay, the bay bridge, and the san francisco skyline. For some photos check out my friend Seth's blog, there is a link on the side. I'll try to recount some of the highlights of last week.

1-- Tuesday morning I arrive and walk a mile or so from the bus stop to campus with a skateboard in my hand and backpack on my back. As I walk I hear birds, and smell the water. Never realize how much I miss the smell of water and humidity until I'm back around it.

2--I arrive at Joe's house around 10:00 and get to talk to him about the loss of his son. It is sad, and hopeful to listen to Joe talk about what it was like to lose his child. He is doing well, but it is definitely what pervades all his thoughts and conversation. He ha sbeen hurt by too many people trying to explain it instead of just telling him, I love you and I care. I pray that people continue to surround he and Lizette with love and support, as it is clear to me that it will take quite awhile for their pain to cease. It was cool to see picture of Elias and hear about he impact so tiny a person could make in such a short time. My friends know God in a way I do not.

3--I rendevous with a pal from college, and RMC student Seth. He was able to stay with us for a few days. That night Seth and I go grocery shopping and are mistaken for a homosexual couple. It was awkward and funny. It was a good picture of how things are a bit different out there. Not exactly a common thing in MS.

4--I enjoyed eating lunch everyday on a bench staring at the water, feeling the sunshine, and enjoying the breeze.

5--I got to eat at a sweet Peruvian restaurant in SF and enjoy the company of friends.

6--I rode my long board in the cool of the night, while listening to the 2nd disc of the newest chili peppers cd. That night was a sweet time of just being alive. I felt like all my senses were engaged and felt alive. Music is powerful. I thank God for the way he has built us to have feelings.

7--Seth and I were able to check out a sweet redwood forest, and two sweet beaches in one day. I was actually able to get in the water and taste it, that night. The night concluded with In and Out burger, so it was pretty sweet.

8--This is probably the most important thing I learned on the trip-Our hearts will always get us in trouble. It seems that often times passion leads to pain. Its not necessarily good are bad, just true I think. I tend to be a fairly passionate individual, and it seems that lately most of that has led to me being hurt in some ways,all of them extremely constructive; but still hurt. The more I live the more I realize when we give ourselves to people, you know really give ourselves to people, we will be hurt. I think that is loving. We never have to worry about being hurt, if we don't really care about anyone. If we dare to love and truly care then we get the risk and the reward that comes with it. So this was a sweet truth to be reminded of; although painful at the time. I need help being practical sometimes and incidences like this help me to settle in and be.

9--Saturday, Sarah picked me up from the airport and we spent th ewhole day together just hanging out, talking, and eating a lot. It felt like a celebration, but I'm not even sure what we were celebrating. We also attended my friend Jim's church plant and that was a great experience. His church is so warm and real. I also was able to share worship with a friend of mine who has been going through some tough life stuff. He has made some decisions tht have stern consequences, but has nevertheless been recieved by a community that has embraced him, without ok'ing his poor choices.

Life is good, and Flow last night was a touching experience of worship for me. I hope that my heart is able to get free of feeling like leading worship is a job. When that happens everything just feels so real, and like God is as close as skin. Last night it felt that way.